Unutterably Silly What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

[howyoudoin]

Mainly for fans of detective fiction, here's an interesting poser:

What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

[afa]

Are we assuming they are both equally skilled?

They will likely find each other to be rather elusive adversaries, and eventually the task will spiral out of your control. Professional pride will motivate each of them to 'catch-out' the other, and you won't even have to pay them anymore.

Maybe they will each hire an associate to help them out, so you will then have 2 pairs of investigators following each other. Even better, you hire two other investigators and instruct each of them to follow each of the other 3...

Pandemonium!

[poohbear_nc]

I think that their endless circling would create an event horizon and generate a small black hole capable of sucking in the entire solar system.

[But you would still be billed for time & expenses by both.]

[michaelryannh]

Am I the only one that immediately thought of Spy vs Spy when I read the topic title?

I know they weren't private investigators.. but I would imagine the same effect happening. Your investigators would relentlessly go at each other, forming a love/hate relationship.

[HomeInMyShoes]

Flash to two cars going in an ever-shrinking circle.

[GA Russell]

I don't think they'd ever get any sleep.

[wodin]

Originally Posted by michaelryannh

Am I the only one that immediately thought of Spy vs Spy when I read the topic title?

I know they weren't private investigators.. but I would imagine the same effect happening. Your investigators would relentlessly go at each other, forming a love/hate relationship.

[Steven Lyle Jordan]

Depends on the investigators. I'd like to imagine the two of them shadowing each other around a corner, only to come nose-to-nose with each other. Discrete inquiry reveals they were hired by the same guy... then they both go after HIM (the Remington Steele style of detective fiction).

OR...

Confrontation leading to a massive slug-fest or shoot-out, and the loser being dragged to the client by the winner (the Bruce Willis style of detective fiction).

OR...

They lose each other almost immediately, only to stumble upon each other in the bathroom (the Columbo style of detective fiction).

[wayrad]

Originally Posted by Steven Lyle Jordan

Depends on the investigators. I'd like to imagine the two of them shadowing each other around a corner, only to come nose-to-nose with each other. Discrete inquiry reveals they were hired by the same guy... then they both go after HIM (the Remington Steele style of detective fiction).

OR...

Confrontation leading to a massive slug-fest or shoot-out, and the loser being dragged to the client by the winner (the Bruce Willis style of detective fiction).

OR...

They lose each other almost immediately, only to stumble upon each other in the bathroom (the Columbo style of detective fiction).

OR...

Together they construct an exciting and entirely fictional series of chases, encounters with sinister strangers, and mysterious events, resulting in a series of cliffhanger reports and two grossly inflated bills.

[Steven Lyle Jordan]

Originally Posted by wayrad

OR...

Together they construct an exciting and entirely fictional series of chases, encounters with sinister strangers, and mysterious events, resulting in a series of cliffhanger reports and two grossly inflated bills.

I like the way you think! (They should probably include a run-in with neo-nazis and at least one Diabolical Plan to Take Over Ze Vorld!)

[GeoffC]

They'd probably hate the sight of each other at first glance, then you know they'll end up getting married and living happily ever-after; after billing you for their time ....

[wannabee]

It was a night from hell. The bill collectors were coming in droves and I was running out of excuses. While pondering which invoice I should avoid next I heard the screeching tyres as a vehicle skidded to a holt out back. I could hear all four car doors slamming one after the other. That meant at least four visitors I wasn't prepared for.
They weren't even trying to be quiet on there way up the stairs and I heard my neighbours cursing at the rabble coming from the landing outside.
Bugger! Who was it this time?

Thump thump thump. "Open the door Geoff? I know you had that dick following me. Just what the hell are you up to? If I find out this is about the ????? Me and my pals here are gonna' rip you to pieces limb by limb."

[DixieGal]

It would create a space/time loop, in which they each shoot the other's grandfather in a wild shootout, thereby causing the loop to collapse, the dicks to never have existed, and (see Pooh's comment above to conclude).

[Steven Lyle Jordan]

Detective A would pull off a Mission: Impossible-style face mask to reveal himself to be detective B.

Detective B would pull off a Mission: Impossible-style face mask to reveal himself to be the client.

The Client would pull off a Mission: Impossible-style face mask to reveal himself to be Nancy Walker.

There would be a distinct whirring sound as Nancy Walker spun rapidly in her grave.

[Solitaire1]

Originally Posted by Steven Lyle Jordan

Detective A would pull off a Mission: Impossible-style face mask to reveal himself to be detective B.

Detective B would pull off a Mission: Impossible-style face mask to reveal himself to be the client.

The Client would pull off a Mission: Impossible-style face mask to reveal himself to be Nancy Walker.

There would be a distinct whirring sound as Nancy Walker spun rapidly in her grave.

Then the Scooby-Doo Gang would arrive. It would be revealed that the very first person they met was behind it all as an elaborate plot to lay claim to a vast oil reserve under the property.