Unutterably Silly Bad Customers

[banjobama]

Anyone in customer service have some horror stories?

Mine, which just now prompted this thread: I work 3rd shift at a hotel front desk. A drunk guy keeps coming down here and harassing me. I gave him a rental movie for free to make him go back to his room. He kept asking me why I wouldn't let him take me out on a date. I said, "I'm married, and besides, you're too old for me." That made him leave, then just a few minutes ago he called the desk and told me that me saying he was too old hurt his feelings. I said, "don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to."

Grrr! Is it 0730 yet??

[GraceKrispy]

The first story that comes to mind is the time two German guys came through my line at the grocery store. I was all excited, having taken four years of German in high school (yes, close to 20 yr prior) and I proudly said "Ich kann litt Deutsch!" The look they gave me was priceless, and they apparently realized Ich kannot litt Deutsch.

It wasnʻt until after they left that I realized my years of Norwegian in college had invaded my knowledge of German and I had produced a 50/50 hybrid. Then Jeg kann litt Norsk and Ich spreche ein bischen Deutsch had morphed into my new language- Deutsk, or Nortsch. At least that pesky Hawaiian stayed out of the action. Now *that* would have been fun!

Ok, so that horror story was really more about my own issues.

I still donʻt get why you wouldnʻt let him take you out for a date....

**all misspelled words in this post are because I can only really think in two language right now, neither of which are Norwegian or German. And possibly English.

[banjobama]

That's pretty embarrassing! I studied Spanish for three years in high school and whenever I try to learn Japanese I just seem to remember a lot of Spanish that I thought I had forgotten.

[MickeyC]

My wife and I were in France near Cannes and stopped off at a beach bar to get a glass of wine. As we both had to go to the bathroom, we went straight to the facilities but it turned out there was just one and you had to take turns. So I let her go first then walked her back to the table and returned to the WC only to discover there was someone in there. So, I settled back to wait.

As I waited, an elderly woman came along who clearly had to go very badly. So, when the occupant came out, I turned to her and, in French, told her to go ahead of me. But, although I meant to say apres vous; I got rattled and said avec vous. She went in very quickly and locked the door.

[Katti's Cat]

I was conducting an audit at one of the radiology sites when a guy (real nice looking, decked out in a very nice and obviously expensive suit) came in asking to have an x-ray done. Sure, that's what they do. Unforunately he did not have an appointment so he was told to wait. Being a guy in a suit that didn't suit him at all and he started getting a bit noisy and threatening the receptionist with all kinds of repercussions ala 'I know the owner' (haha sure, it's (was) a public company with a few 100000 shareholders), 'I will get you fired' (not likely to happen with me being her witness), 'you are useless' and so on.

I intervened at the 'useless' part and told him to please take a seat while I was checking the appointment book and talk to the doctor to see what I could do for him. He calmed a little and sat down. (ha, works all the time).

After checking the appointments I went back to him and told him that we are currently very busy with cancer patients and expecting a few patients from the A&E department. I offered him an appointment in 45 minutes or he could go upstairs to get it done at a smaller department immediately.

Well, did he hit the roof. Went right through actually. He got very abusive, loud and rude. In my case, not a good combination so I did the smart thing and just left him raving in the waiting room while I went and talked to the doctor. No point getting agro with him.

After 10 minutes he was still raving and going on, so I went back and told him to calm down and take a seat. Again, he went off and told us all 'don't you know who I am' (no we didn't) and 'i am important' (really?????), and 'I have an important meeting in 10 minutes'.

After having the doctor review his medical referral (nothing lifethreatening) I advised him that we just haven't got the capacity at the time and offered him some painkillers (not that he needed them, but hey, most guys are wusses) and told him I would get him to the appointment and would pick him up afterwards to be taken straight to the xray.

Well, although he didn't calm down, he accepted the offer. I drove him back to work. He made the meeting and called me 30 minutes later for a pick-up. As promised I did that. Again he was very abusive and rude but heck, things you endure for work. And better me than a poor clerical staff member who doesn't have the confidence to fight back.

As we got back to the practice he went off again because he had to complete some paperwork which delayed him further. (the same form he had in his grubby little hands ever since he first walked in). After completing the registration process he got his xray done with a doctor being so kind to check the results immediately (not always happening in a busy practice but we just wanted to get rid of him).

Another explosion when we told him he had to pay for the xray. Geeee, did he go off. Surprised really he didn't blow up. Then another explosion when told he had to wait 10 minutes for the report. But eventually he paced the waiting room. Obviously all the excitement went to his stomach and he went to the toilet.

Finally the report was done and he got called to the front desk to hand over the films & reports. He huffed & puffed and told us all that we hadnt' heard the last of him (yes we had, cos he got put on the blacklist for all our practices).

When he walked out, a huge smile appeared on all our faces. He turned around at the door, looked confused at us because of our wide grins but didn't say a word. Nor did we, when he walked out with a trail of toiletpaper hanging out of the top of his pants.

[GraceKrispy]

wow, katti! See, you were kind all the way through and you got your prize at the end!

[carlobee]

Yeah. it's a good thing you have been kind all the way through. I see you are doing a great job. Keep it up.

[phenomshel]

I get a fair amount of abuse when I have to deny alcohol sales. Usually it's just because the person doesn't have their ID with them. But alcohol sales are strictly governed in the county in Illinois in which I live, so there are other ways to run afoul of the law too. The two that stand out most: We had a regular customer who owns a beauty salon in town. Nice guy, or so I always thought. One night he came in, got his usual bottle of wine, but he had a minor with him that wasn't related to him. I knew the kid, knew he wasn't related, and denied the sale. The customer hit the roof. Took his store card off his keys, threw it at me and said he'd never be back, (he has been back, but not when I was working).
The second one was, I denied a sale for no ID. The customer bought some other items anyway, but the guy signed his credit card transaction with "F*** YOU" I very calmly canceled the sale and told him he'd have to re-sign. He didn't like it, but he did it.

[GraceKrispy]

When I was working at that grocery store, the part that stressed me out most was carding for alcohol/cigarette sales. One time, I did deny a guy cigs because his ID was not valid according to state code (they are very picky about what constitutes a valid ID and no way was I going to jail in case I was being tested!). He blew a gasket, went back to the liquor section, trashed about $700 worth of liquor, then walked out with several large bottles of beer. Without paying of course. Pretty much freaked me out! I had my share of customers who had some serious issues with me even carding them, but that one took the cake.

[SimonSays]

Only bad thing I have is when I worked at Toys R Us during the holiday season. I was ringing up this women's xmas items, two carts full, and when I gave her the total, she handed me a check. In inputed the information from her check into the cash register which sent me a notice that the check was bad and that she actually had a warrant out for her arrest for "multiple bounced checks"

I just casually made eye contact with my manager and explained to the woman that her check did not go through and if she had another means to pay for her purchases, preferably cash. Well, she picked up a baby doll that she was planning on buying that had not been bagged yet and began to throw it around in my face yelling obsentaties. The store guard started to make his way over and she took off out of the store with the doll, the guard chasing her.

It was then and there that I decided I hated dealing with people

[SimonSays]

Originally Posted by GraceKrispy

When I was working at that grocery store, the part that stressed me out most was carding for alcohol/cigarette sales. One time, I did deny a guy cigs because his ID was not valid according to state code (they are very picky about what constitutes a valid ID and no way was I going to jail in case I was being tested!). He blew a gasket, went back to the liquor section, trashed about $700 worth of liquor, then walked out with several large bottles of beer. Without paying of course. Pretty much freaked me out! I had my share of customers who had some serious issues with me even carding them, but that one took the cake.

wow! Did they ever catch him?

[GraceKrispy]

Originally Posted by SimonSays

wow! Did they ever catch him?

Well, the "funny" thing is that the other person working with me knew the guy. So she called her friend, and the guy was just sitting at his friendʻs house, drinking the beers he had taken. The manager reported the loss to the cops (we had our share of cops in there getting shoplifters and the like) along with the info about who the guy was and where he was. No follow-up was ever done.

[Fledchen]

I work at a gas station, so I have many tales of horror!

Many of these tales involve bodily fluids and/or the restrooms. There was the guy who came in after getting in a knife fight and bled all over the men's room. Several incidents of people defecating on the floor, or smearing feces on the wall, and even one time someone stood on the toilet seat and defecated against the wall. Then there was the drunk guy who decided he didn't want to wait in line for the restroom, so he urinated all over a 12-foot display of candy, ruining several thousand dollars worth of merchandise.

Some of our "customers" are there to steal the merchandise rather than pay for it. We have one serial offender (he cycles through dozens of convenience stores in the metro area) who will steal batteries and then try to "return" them for the cash. He gets children (I don't know if they are his, or nieces/nephews, or possibly grandchildren) to help him, which is sickening. People open packages, eat part of the contents, and then leave the open package sitting out. If they're feeling really creative, they'll dump the contents out. There was one person who opened a package of gummi worms, licked the candies, and stuck them to the shelves. My ultimate favorite shoplifter story is about a guy who stole from the hardware store across the street, and then came into my store while fleeing police, locked himself in the men's room, and tried to flush the evidence down the toilet. Just in case you didn't know, gloves do not go through plumbing very well. We had to call a plumber to sewer-snake the offending garment out to give to the police for evidence. I don't think the cops were too happy about collecting that particular piece of evidence.

Customers love dishing out verbal abuse for the most petty of perceived slights, such as being out of stock of something, or having to show ID for age-restricted products, or being told that they can't smoke while filling their gas tanks. Some especially asinine people resort to racial epithets. Occasionally they become violent. One customer attacked my former boss, breaking my boss's glasses and bruising him pretty badly, because the customer didn't like one of the ingredients in his sandwich. Folks, if you have allergies, dietary restrictions, or just plain think something is icky, ask for help before you buy something instead of complaining after the fact. I also wish that the Powers That Be at corporate HQ would listen to me when I explain that we have a large number of vegetarian, Jewish, and Muslim customers who can't eat most of our products and I'm tired of having to disappoint them.

There's the creeps who hit on me and my co-workers and make explicit sexual comments. The employees are not on the menu, OK?!

So who wants to come to work with me tomorrow?

[banjobama]

Originally Posted by Fledchen

I work at a gas station, so I have many tales of horror!

Many of these tales involve bodily fluids and/or the restrooms.

Eeeek! Ok my job isn't so bad!

My father-in-law owns a Chevron station in Sturgis, South Dakota, and I guess people just destroy his restrooms during the rally. One year he decided to close them and just rent some Port-a-Potties instead and people wrote to the newspaper and complained!

[GraceKrispy]

Originally Posted by Fledchen

*snip*

So who wants to come to work with me tomorrow?

I *so* donʻt want to go to work with you!! Yikes.