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#1 |
When's Doughnut Day?
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Houston, TX, US
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Donut Night: An Insignificant Nugget of Dementia
Part I - First, You Mix The Dough
It was late. Again. Another long night spent w***ing well past dinner time just to ensure that my employer's little slice of capitalism was suitably protected from the onslaught of - of what? And just how many years does a guy have to w*** before "40 hours a week" begins to take only 60 hours a week? Anyway, it must have been around midnight when I drove past the donut shop on my way home. God, I love that place! ![]() I was tired, sleepy, and hungry as a dog! And I could really have gone for a donut right about then. I put the top down on my convertible in a lame attempt to let the cold air in (it was the first of March) to drive away my hunger pangs and to keep me awake. But I couldn't have gone much further before I briefly - just for an instant, mind you - nodded off. When I caught myself and awoke in a start, I could see this guy in my headlights - a donut by the shoulder of the road - hitchiking (at this hour of the night??). ![]() I was so startled that I almost wet my pants as I slammed on the brakes and swerved to miss him. [DUCK!!!, ![]() [THOUAQUE!!!, "Hey, can you give me a lift?", he asked. "What?" "I said, can you give me a lift? I'm kinda in a dunk right now and could really use your help." "Sure, sure", I must have said, not really knowing what to say. "Thanks", came from somewhere out of the massive toroid, as he squeezed into my car. "You wouldn't believe how crazy it is out there tonight." "Crazy? Where?", I asked. Like an idiot. "You know. Out there!" He pointed up (with what??). But all I could really think about was that I must have died in a car accident and gone to heaven because there was this massive donut in my car - and he had sprinkles! Then I wondered if perhaps it was all in my head. And, just maybe, the reason it suddenly felt crowded in my car was because it was me that had had one too many with sprinkles. ![]() |
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#2 |
zeldinha zippy zeldissima
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Paris, France
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: standing ovation !: bravo !!! i can't wait for part the second !
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#3 |
Storm Surge'n
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Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Lobster Capital
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A picture book. I love it. More...More...
![]() (I'm not going to ask the obvious question, I'll wait for the next chapter to find out. ![]() |
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#4 |
Wizard
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Northeast Ohio, USA
Device: PRS-900
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Excellent! Good thing it wasn't a jelly filled donut - that would have been hard to get out of the seats.
Waiting for the sequel now.... |
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#5 |
No wire hangers, ever!
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Brilliant! And I love how "work" is astricked out..lol
imPatiently waiting for the story to continue on... |
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#6 |
It's about the umbrella
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Join Date: Jan 2009
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#7 |
When's Doughnut Day?
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Karma: 13675475
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Houston, TX, US
Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad
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Part, The Second - Then You Stir Stuphph Up
![]() "You're a donut." "No kidding!", he said. "And no." "No what?, I asked. "No to Wrong Donut Extravaganza's question", he replied. "Wait, let's just be sensible for a minute ![]() "Okay. Let's." came the words from behind the second swirly row of sprinkles. "Let's just do that. But would you step on it, please? I'd like to get as far away from here as I can." ![]() "What, did you hold up the donut shop or something?", I asked sarcastically. You know, time is a curious thing. Have you ever noticed that sometimes a second can feel like an hour? ![]() Well, a few of those seconds went by in cold silence and I could somehow sense....I don't know....look, it sounds strange...but I could somehow tell that this donut was staring at me. ![]() "Oh, great! I'm probably totally bonkers! And yet somehow," I yelled angrily as I attempted to grab something like his collar, "somehow, I bet the cops end up arresting me for aiding and abetting a confection!" "Oh, real cute, big guy! But who said I was a confection, huh? I'm not a confection. A confection contains fruit or jelly. Didn't you hear Dave say I donut....erm, do not...contain jelly? That would be a mess - particularly with you squeezing me that way. And your anger is kneadless. Chill out." "What did you just say?" "I said your anger is kneadless." "I'm gonna hurt you." ![]() Last edited by vivaldirules; 02-28-2010 at 08:51 AM. |
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#8 |
Storm Surge'n
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Location: Lobster Capital
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You gotta help the doughnut VR. Don't let the coppers squeeze a confection out of him.
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#9 |
Grand Sorcerer
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Join Date: Oct 2009
Device: Astak Pocket PRO, iPod Touch, PRS-650
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#10 |
It's about the umbrella
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Join Date: Jan 2009
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![]() Waiting for more, so I clicked a button and sent you a little "help" ... 911 ![]() |
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#11 |
Now what?
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Durham, NC
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Don't be cruller to the donut (best donut pun I could come up with).
He might be carrying a bear claw! |
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#12 |
When's Doughnut Day?
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Karma: 13675475
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Houston, TX, US
Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad
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Part C - Now Roll It Out and Cut It Into Coicles
![]() "Okay. Okay, so you're a donut. Fine. And I'm driving you......where? And why?" The donut went quiet again. Soon, I could hear gentle sobbing that led to a few sprinkles tinkling onto the floor mats of my convertible. Finally, he regained his composure. "You know what day this is, right?", he asked softly. "March 1. So?" ![]() "Nope. It's after midnight. So today is....come on, you can do it." "Okay, March 2nd," I offered, trying to understand the significance. "BINGO! ![]() "Those are bongos, not bingo. And that's easy. The 2nd of every month is Donut Day. Over at ![]() ![]() "DOUBLE BINGO! "Those are bongos! Don't you know the difference between....oh, never mind. And so? Donut Day at ![]() ![]() ![]() "It's because March 2nd is also February 30th. And in Donutland that's like a glazed double red velvet with jelly, sprinkles, chocolate, and extra nuts. Got it?" "I got only the nuts. So, no. And why are your robbing a donut shop? The donut......[Does he have a name? God, how I wish he had a name. It would be sooooo much easier to tell this story if he did. But, alas, if he had a name, I've forgotten it. Of course, I suppose I could make one up. But what name? What name? I wonder.] Anyway, the donut proceeded to tell me a story about how... ![]() [Ooops. Time for intermission. Wouldn't you just love to go out to the concession stand for a big Coke and a dozen donuts?! You would, wouldn't you? Wouldn't you?] |
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#13 |
Wizard
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Brisbane Australia
Device: Sony PRS-600
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Oooooh I can't wait for the story to continue. Please don't make me cry on behalf of that giant donut
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#14 |
It's about the umbrella
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Oh, no! Intermission! Will there be a possible "twist" in the story.
![]() Be careful to stay away from decadent "bars", because if you met a "Long John" you'll "fritter" away your time. ![]() Last edited by dreams; 02-27-2010 at 09:08 PM. Reason: changed to fit |
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#15 |
Grand Sorcerer
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Join Date: Oct 2009
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Is his name Doug H. Nut?
![]() OK, no-one take my seat while I go for a drink and snack. ![]() |
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