Rectum? It nearly killed 'im! - Page 6

DixieGal · 11-10-2010, 04:41 PM

Famous last words: Hey y'all, how much you wanna bet I'll do it?

DixieGal · 11-10-2010, 04:44 PM

UPDATE: Several reports of copycat criminals using real cats

Angst · 11-10-2010, 04:44 PM

Do you want to play hide and seek?

DixieGal · 11-10-2010, 04:47 PM

I think maybe I've run out of mousetrap jokes now.

dsvick · 11-10-2010, 04:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DixieGal

I think maybe I've run out of mousetrap jokes now.

I've got you covered...

News Alert

Noah Smith tries, and sort of succeeds, to build a better mouse trap.

dsvick · 11-10-2010, 04:50 PM

ohhh, MouseTRAP, said Mr Smith at the young inventors convention.

DixieGal · 11-10-2010, 04:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Angst

Do you want to play hide and seek?

Quote:

Originally Posted by dsvick

I've got you covered...

News Alert

Noah Smith tries, and sort of succeeds, to build a better mouse trap.

Good ones!

dsvick · 11-10-2010, 04:51 PM

Mr Smith was surprised to find out he was not the only one who noticed when he cut the cheese.

ardeegee · 11-10-2010, 06:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dsvick

Noah Smith tries, and sort of succeeds, to build a better mouse trap.

But the world is not beating a path to his ass.

DixieGal · 11-10-2010, 07:41 PM

He got a mouse because the pet store was out of the more aerodynamic prairie dog.

Billjr13 · 11-10-2010, 08:32 PM

I heard it as an old joke. The story being a little kid in school is showing his class a purple heart award that his uncle got in the war; and all through the story the boy keeps saying a$$ when refering to where his uncle got shot. Finally after five or six times of hearing him say a$$ the teacher interupts him and says rectum... to which the little boy says " Wreck'm hell lady it almost killed 'em."

bjones6416 · 11-10-2010, 09:08 PM

This is killing me -- I laughed hard enough when I first read the article, but after all this?

I have to agree, though, "Quick, someone shove a cat up my a$$!" is the best one!

(Although the "hickory dickory dock" one is pretty good too!)

mediax · 11-11-2010, 07:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MJK2111

Rectum? It nearly killed 'im!

Does anyone have the joke that fits the punchline above? I've been looking for the sucker for years with no luck...

The version I know is (with appropriate apologies for language, taste and decency):

Teacher: Well, class, what did you do during your holidays?

Little Johnny: Me and me mates, Miss, we stuck a banger* up this cat's @$$

Teacher: Rectum, Johnny, rectum

Little Johnny: Yes miss - blew 'im to pieces!

A little editing will make it fit the exact line you quote . . .

* Just in case, a banger is a small, explosive firework.

kennyc · 11-11-2010, 09:01 PM

You people are SICK SICK SICK!!!

and I love you!

nohmi2 · 11-12-2010, 01:14 AM

What a bum rap!

Cheers

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11-10-2010, 04:41 PM	#76
DixieGal Hi There! Posts: 7,473 Karma: 2930523 Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Ft Lauderdale Device: iPad	Famous last words: Hey y'all, how much you wanna bet I'll do it?

11-10-2010, 04:44 PM	#77
DixieGal Hi There! Posts: 7,473 Karma: 2930523 Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Ft Lauderdale Device: iPad	UPDATE: Several reports of copycat criminals using real cats

11-10-2010, 04:44 PM	#78
Angst Cannon Fodder Posts: 2,835 Karma: 50921712 Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Probably a library Device: PRS-350, Kindle DX, Kindle Paperwhite	Do you want to play hide and seek?

11-10-2010, 04:47 PM	#79
DixieGal Hi There! Posts: 7,473 Karma: 2930523 Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Ft Lauderdale Device: iPad	I think maybe I've run out of mousetrap jokes now.

11-10-2010, 04:50 PM	#81
dsvick Wizard Posts: 2,737 Karma: 635747 Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Northeast Ohio, USA Device: PRS-900	ohhh, MouseTRAP, said Mr Smith at the young inventors convention.

11-10-2010, 04:51 PM	#83
dsvick Wizard Posts: 2,737 Karma: 635747 Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Northeast Ohio, USA Device: PRS-900	Mr Smith was surprised to find out he was not the only one who noticed when he cut the cheese.

11-10-2010, 07:41 PM	#85
DixieGal Hi There! Posts: 7,473 Karma: 2930523 Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Ft Lauderdale Device: iPad	He got a mouse because the pet store was out of the more aerodynamic prairie dog.

11-10-2010, 08:32 PM	#86
Billjr13 Addict Posts: 357 Karma: 550002 Join Date: Jan 2009 Location: Colorado Device: Sony PRS 700 & 650	I heard it as an old joke. The story being a little kid in school is showing his class a purple heart award that his uncle got in the war; and all through the story the boy keeps saying a$$ when refering to where his uncle got shot. Finally after five or six times of hearing him say a$$ the teacher interupts him and says rectum... to which the little boy says " Wreck'm hell lady it almost killed 'em."

11-10-2010, 09:08 PM	#87
bjones6416 ↓↓ Skirt!! Earrings!! Posts: 3,394 Karma: 17432172 Join Date: Jun 2009 Location: Georgia, USA Device: Acer netbook, JetBook Lite, Sony PRS-300, Kindle 2, Kindle Fire	This is killing me -- I laughed hard enough when I first read the article, but after all this? I have to agree, though, "Quick, someone shove a cat up my a$$!" is the best one! (Although the "hickory dickory dock" one is pretty good too!)

11-11-2010, 09:01 PM	#89
kennyc The Dank Side of the Moon Posts: 35,872 Karma: 118716293 Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Denver, CO Device: Kindle2; Kindle Fire	You people are SICK SICK SICK!!! and I love you!

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11-12-2010, 01:14 AM	#90
nohmi2 Pensively observing. Posts: 1,758 Karma: 12675456 Join Date: Jun 2008 Device: Varied.	What a bum rap! Cheers