04-19-2009, 07:37 PM | #16 |
Banned
Posts: 5,100
Karma: 72193
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: South of the Border
Device: Coffin
|
Well I hope you enjoy reading it If not, well, you haven't lost anything but a few minutes of time
|
04-19-2009, 08:14 PM | #17 |
It's about the umbrella
Posts: 25,110
Karma: 56250158
Join Date: Jan 2009
Device: Sony 505| K Fire | KK 3G+Wi-Fi | iPhone 3Gs |Vista 32-bit Hm Prem w/FF
|
Just had to sneak in and have a peek .. but alas caught on the laptop and have to go out and do my fair share of work
Is this an extra word? Jeff glanced to where he’d (been stood) only moments before. Move to here maybe? (Jeff shivered.) Her voice was a cool summer breeze and a winter chill at the same time. Darn, gotta get out there. Will finish reading this later... Thanks again. |
Advert | |
|
04-19-2009, 08:17 PM | #18 | |
Banned
Posts: 5,100
Karma: 72193
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: South of the Border
Device: Coffin
|
Quote:
I'll look it over in the morning. At the moment my eyes can't focus I'm that tired Thanks for reading. |
|
04-20-2009, 12:06 AM | #19 |
It's about the umbrella
Posts: 25,110
Karma: 56250158
Join Date: Jan 2009
Device: Sony 505| K Fire | KK 3G+Wi-Fi | iPhone 3Gs |Vista 32-bit Hm Prem w/FF
|
Loved it! Very different from your other shorts..
It left me wondering who was... oops don't want to spoil it for anyone. Keep writing. I use to not like reading short stories (not even anthologies from my favorite authors) but, I've found that lately I am really starting to appreciate them. Thank you so much for sharing with us. (now if you would just put up a tip jar, I would even dig out the credit cards<haven't been used for 10 years and still they keep upping my limits!>, get a pay pal account and leave a little something) |
04-20-2009, 08:14 AM | #20 |
zeldinha zippy zeldissima
Posts: 27,827
Karma: 921169
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Paris, France
Device: eb1150 & is that a nook in her pocket, or she just happy to see you?
|
i read it last night ; i loved it too ! i particularly like the idea that a city is interesting for the people who live there, more than for the monuments ! i completely agree. i'm looking forward to reading more of your stories !! i think you should put them back on feedbooks just long enough for me to download them...
not to be a critic, but i think i found a typo : "she smiled and it was as if Venus had turned after at thousand years to greet him." |
Advert | |
|
04-20-2009, 08:42 AM | #21 | |
Banned
Posts: 5,100
Karma: 72193
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: South of the Border
Device: Coffin
|
Quote:
Thanks again, for reading |
|
04-20-2009, 08:45 AM | #22 | |
Banned
Posts: 5,100
Karma: 72193
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: South of the Border
Device: Coffin
|
Quote:
There'll be two collections of shorts on Feedbooks soon enough (again, real life gets in the way). This was a one-off, just something that struck me and I had to write it down. |
|
04-20-2009, 08:54 AM | #23 | |
zeldinha zippy zeldissima
Posts: 27,827
Karma: 921169
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Paris, France
Device: eb1150 & is that a nook in her pocket, or she just happy to see you?
|
Quote:
|
|
|
Similar Threads | ||||
Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
Are you a Short Story Reader? What's your favorite story? | kennyc | Reading Recommendations | 34 | 01-13-2010 04:58 PM |
Spinning (short short story) | kennyc | Writers' Corner | 9 | 09-13-2009 09:14 PM |
A short story. | Taylor514ce | Writers' Corner | 8 | 08-14-2009 11:40 AM |
Very Short Story | Moejoe | Writers' Corner | 4 | 04-28-2009 08:31 PM |
Anything and Everything (just a really short story) | Dragoro | Writers' Corner | 9 | 03-13-2009 01:06 PM |